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Showing posts from 2012

Making Life Easier Part 1

I'll be a full fledged curmudgeon soon. I've been practicing all my life, but I believe that 65 is the likely age at which one can officially be deemed an Andy Rooney-esque curmudgeon. In light of my approaching status as a curmudgeon, I'm creating this "Making Life Easier" series to all the danged young whippersnappers out there that seem not to have a clue about attending to their own enlightened self interest. Note -- this series is also aimed at Idiots: whippersnappers who no longer have youth and inexperience as an excuse for their actions.

So... for whippersnappers and idiots, here's an example of the self-defeating behavior that I'm talking about -- the Airport Baggage Claim.

What everyone wants is to get his or her bag quickly and easily off the carousel... it should be so easy. Passengers surround the carousel, grab their bags as they pass, and place each safely behind them, where, when all bags have been collected, they can then easily cart to the…

The Election

As an Obama supporter, naturally I'm glad that my guy "won". However -- you'll get no gloating from me.

I've come close to shedding tears in this last few months over the incredible vitriol poisoning our country. Nobody wins until we can get past the "our team vs. your team" mentality.

Divisive politics is good for cable news network ratings . Their polarizing rhetoric garners a loyal following. And political campaign managers believe that they must sharply distinguish their client's beliefs from his/her opponent's in order to generate interest.

But, we have some serious problems to face and we're not going to solve these through name calling, stonewalling, and petty bickering. We must not be our own worst enemy... there are plenty of REAL enemies to take that honor.

If you're a "liberal", spend some time listening to the concerns of your "conservative" neighbor... and vice versa. If you listen to Rush, spend a l…

Physicists Gone Wild

AUSTIN, TX -- Thousands of theoretical physicists celebrating the confirmation of the Higgs Boson, spilled into the streets last night. The rejoicing, dancing of jigs, and telling of ironic stories soon turned to violence. Disagreements over credit for the original theory and the implications of the discovery, heated, then erupted into fist fights, scratching, and pulling of hair. Several incidents of biting were reported, but no serious injuries resulted.
One physicist, his pocket protector hanging loose having been torn from his shirt in a skirmish, blamed the violence on “outside agitators”. A group of engineers calling themselves IFMB (Invisible Force, My Butt) staged a counter demonstration. Some witnesses report hearing taunts such as, “Where’s the practical application, math boy?” shortly before the violence escalated.
There is an uneasy quiet in the streets of Austin tonight. Police say they’re planning ahead for the announcement of the Nobel Prize in Physics which has the po…

Hey, That's Not Funny!

Hey, That's Not Funny! We live in the age of Edgy Comedy. Or, more accurately, we live in the age where comedians want to be perceived as Edgy. To be Edgy, you have to toe that line -- and sometimes you're going to cross that line. To be Funny is to be Edgy, and conversely, to be Edgy is to be Funny. Right?
Ummm... really?
Now, who am I to question the wisdom behind pop culture -- I mean, audiences choose what they like, right? It's not like, for example, disco was crammed down our collective throats (to use a particularly tasteless analogy.) The poor record executives were simply responding to popular demand -- the popular demand to supply cocaine, hookers, money, and other goodies to radio program directors who, without these perks, wouldn't stand within a mile of K.C. and the Sunshine Band if it meant hearing "Shake Your Booty".
Edgy comedy is nothing new. Just go back and read Voltaire... what a hoot! Man -- that guy really skewered the prevailing power…

These Things Bother Me

I'm not a "conspiricist" -- but I'm certainly a skeptic. When money and power are involved, I know that those who seek, above all, money and power, are conspiratorial, conniving, cynical, corrupt and capable of criminal capers! When considering the actions of the power-class, the skeptic in me arises like Lt. Colombo from his Peugeot -- I just want to ask "one more question".

In this case, I've been reading some JFK assassination discussions. This event, that bleak day in November, 1963, shattered my sheltered suburban teenage world. At age 15, I was not sufficiently politically astute to judge policy, but like many, if not most Americans, we were fascinated by the colorful couple that occupied the White House. They represented what we wanted our country to be -- smart, good looking, well spoken, daring, idealistic. Seeing the President gunned down like a rabid dog on the streets of some wild west border town was devastating to our national psyche.

But …